The Crying Game Saturday, May 12, 2012
Posted by angstycrayon in Uncategorized.Tags: Fat, Issues, Mental Health, Problems, Stupid, Suicide, Talentless, Ugly
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Yesterday. Friday 11th May 2012. I CRIED. I poured with tears. I felt like NOBODY loved me, I felt like NOBODY wanted me. I felt as if I had failed not only myself, my family, my town, my country, my planet but GOD HIMSELF. I felt as if GOD HATED ME. I felt like I could hear him screaming at me, “YOU SUCK! I HATE YOU! YOU SINNING PIECE OF DISPOSABLE CRAP.” I felt like I COULDN’T go on. But I KNEW I was a COWARD so there was no way I would have the balls to kill myself. I felt TRAPPED in this world that I no longer wanted to be on.
I felt TALENTLESS, STUPID and a complete and total WASTE of LIFE.
I kept thinking NEGATIVE thoughts. I thought of all my problems and how they’ve prevented me from having a normal life. I thought about all the wasted opportunities I’ve had. All those years I did NOTHING but lay in bed having fantasises of fame and fortune. All those years (and continue) I spend locked away in my bedroom. Cut off from the world at large other than my internet connection. I kept thinking of how UGLY, FAT and UNATTRACTIVE I am. I kept thinking how EVERYBODY HATES me. Not just in my town but across THE WORLD. I thought about how even if I did become famous, people would just HATE ME EVEN MORE. They’d BULLY ME AGAIN through the MEDIA. I imagined all the ASSHOLES and BULLIES that made my life hell in High School selling their stories about me to the press and getting rich off their LIES.
Maybe it’s best I KILLED MYSELF. But HOW? I’m SUCH A FUCKING WIMP-ASS DICKLESS FUCKING COWARD!! I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself.
What can I do with my life? I’m almost 28. I’ve WASTED my youth being locked away in my bedroom. I’ve NEVER had a Girlfriend (women hate me). I have NO FRIENDS (everybody hates me). I struggle with even the most basic conversation. I just don’t know what to say. I get stuck for words. I’m worried about looking like an idiot (which I am). How can I possibly continue living like this!? IF ONLY… I think, If only I were rich and famous. People would like me. I’d have friends. Women would want to date me (still unlikely). But I’m worried about the problems I mentioned above. Not to mention I SUCK AT EVERYTHING I TRY!! I really don’t have any talent. I can’t finish anything. I’m always starting new projects that end up being discarded after a few days. I’m FAT. I’m STUPID.
Writing requires intelligence. I don’t have that. Music requires intelligence. I don’t have that. Drawing requires intelligence. I don’t have that. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I hate myself. I’m full of ANGER and HATRED. I have a LOT of serious personality problems. I am BETTER OFF DEAD.
Writing Outside the Comfort Zone Thursday, May 10, 2012
Posted by angstycrayon in Art, Literature, Poetry, Writing.Tags: Epic Poetry, Howl, Misogyny, Poetry, Tortured Artist, Writing
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Grab your BALLS, it’s SMOKING time!! (I don’t smoke.) In my post yesterday I mentioned how I’ve come to be influenced by Allen Ginsberg epic poem, `Howl.’ I managed to start a Sci-Fi poem of my own using Ginsberg’s fixed base, long line structure as a basis. I’m quite pleased with how it has turned out. I’ve only done half a page so far but it’s going well and I’m enjoying it.
But Ginsberg poem was a PROTEST poem. It featured drug use, and homosexuality in it. It was even prosecuted for obscenity.
I SO WANNA DO SOMETHING LIKE IT!!! I’m NOT a homosexual or a drug addict. Nor do I generally like those sort of people. Although when I was going through a TORTURED ARTIST phase back in 2006-2010, I IMAGINED myself being a drug addict.
So I will need to WRITE outside MY COMFORT ZONE. I plan to include some drug abuse, possibly sex maybe even gay sex. I’ll see how the poem flows. Although my EPIC POEM will be set in SPACE and features a FEMALE HEROINE. I will be including some of my own experiences within. Those to do with MENTAL HEALTH and MISOGYNY in particular. I struggle with those issues everyday. I will have my female hero be somewhat of a mentally unstable type who hates her own gender (!?). Or something like that. All the details will need to be worked out in my head as I write.
But since reading, Howl, and starting POETIC CRITIC website I have become ADDICTED to writing poetry. I LOVE it again. That’s always a positive thing. If it keeps me productive during the day instead of just laying in bed having murder/suicide thoughts, then that’s ALWAYS a good thing. And so far it has done just that. I actually feel I **MIGHT** finish something. But then again, I pretty much ALWAYS have that feeling whenever I start a piece of writing. But you never know. I MAY do it this time. I’ve just got to keep my interest going.
And in that sense, PoeticCritic.com, my new website should help. If I can be inspired to update it regularly then it will mean I will need to be writing a lot of poetry. If I’m writing a lot of poetry then hopefully I might finish one of the longer works. Or so I hope.
Some Powerful Inspiration Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Posted by angstycrayon in Art, Literature, Poetry, Writing.Tags: Allen Ginsberg, Beat Poets, Epic Poetry, Howl, Literature, Poetry, Writing
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Since launching my new blog PoeticCritic, I’ve discovered, much to my delight, Allen Ginsberg, ‘Howl‘ beat poem. Read it here. I LOVE the LONG sentences. Usually I write short, sharp phrases and plenty of line breaks. This has been my style ever since I started writing poetry in 2008. I mostly started by rewriting lyrics to songs I like. To normally get those lyrics to fit. I wrote in short sentences. But when I started reading it, I started to get inspiration and new ideas for my own poetry.
Which is always COOL.
Ginsberg’s poem was written with performance in mind. It has pauses (commas) where you would normally pause for breath during speaking. I am very much serious about writing something similar from my own experiences. Or from a fictional character’s experience. I haven’t decided yet. But I am now SERIOUS about pursing POETRY as a viable career path. Sure, I probably won’t make much money from it. Not many poets do. But it’s the thrill, the beauty of writing poetry that I LOVE. I have fallen in love with poetry again after nearly 4 years being obsessed with MUSIC.
Sure, I would STILL love to COMPOSE music and WRITE LYRICS. But my aim is to write as much epic poetry as possible. And just hope, that I can get some of it published. There’s LONG POEM MAGAZINE which publishes twice yearly, that deals with long poems (specifically those longer than the standard 40 lines) which could help me get off to a flying start. Should I ever finish this poem I’m planning and get it published in there. I know many poetry publishers in this country (Britain) don’t really publish new poets unless they’ve spent a few years getting published in the small presses. Of which Long Poem Magazine is one.
I don’t know though if they publish EPIC POEMS, which is what the poem will be. I’ll have to write it and see, I suppose. The FIRST thing I have to do, is get a sense of exactly what I want to convey in the poem. I LOVE the idea of doing a William Burroughs style Drug Addiction type epic poem. Maybe even doing in a cut-up way. But certainly I will follow in the footprint of Ginsberg with the LONG SENTENCES and flowing lines. Then I have to WRITE the bloody thing.
Hope I can ACTUALLY FINISH IT!! I struggle to finish things. I haven’t really finished a major piece of writing since 2008. When I wrote a (crappy) play. I think my problem is I keep fantasising about my works being too long. That puts me off. I imagine writing a 1000 paged epic. Something I probably COULDN’T do. But I keep thinking about anyway. And when I come to actually making an attempt to write a major piece of writing. I get worried it will be too long and I’ll NEVER finish it. That in turn, puts me off and I end not finishing it anyway. So it’s a vicious cycle I’m stuck in.
WRITE. EPIC. POETRY.
I am…. THE POETIC CRITIC Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Posted by angstycrayon in Poetry, Uncategorized, Writing.Tags: Criticism, Poems, Poetry, Reviews, Website
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I have created a brand new identity; Poetic Critic. HA HA HA HA!! It’s a blog I’ve been wanting to do for a long time but couldn’t be arsed to do. Until now.
I will basically be criticising things I LOVE, and things I HATE. But mostly things I hate. It’s my way of getting petty revenge. As the blog title suggests, I will be doing all the criticism in POETIC VERSE. I’m hoping this will motivate me to keep writing as much poetry as possible. I need to practise. Things that motivate me the most are things that usually make me angry. These can be silly things like books, movies and songs or serious things like politics. Usually I stomp around in my bedroom seething with anger and that helps no-one. But if I can force myself to sit down a write a cohesive poem about why that thing is so bad and why I hate it. Then I feel that’s a more CONSTRUCTIVE thing to do.
Much better than simply wishing people were dead and fantasising about killing WOMEN. Right? I thought so. Anyway, check me out!!
Plays & Poetry – Going Back To My First Loves Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Posted by angstycrayon in Composing/Composition, Literature, Music, Poetry, Writing.Tags: Epic Poetry, Literature, Music, Poems, Poetry, Writing
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MUSIC IS IMPOSSIBLE!! I can’t figure it out. I can’t do it no matter how hard I try. I am just a complete and total failure at it. I tried to do some chords and messed up. I tried just setting some lyrics to rhythms but it didn’t seem right. I certainly can’t do melodies. I just suck. I struggle to describe how badly I’m doing with music. I mean, DAMN, I stink at it. Think of the worst song in history. That sounds like SUPER-ULTRA-GENIUS compared to what I’m composing. I am doing some bad, bad stuff. I surprise myself just how awful I seem to be getting lately. The worst part about it is, I actually sometimes think it is good initially. It’s after a few hours later do I realize how AWFUL my music is. So I am doing my best to try to GIVE UP on any dreams, thoughts or fantasizes about music. Because I know they’ll NEVER come true.
Which means I have to focus on other things. Like WRITING, DRAWING, and PHOTOGRAPHY. I have therefore decided to go back to what I was attempting to do before I abandoned it for music in 2009. That is mostly POETRY and PLAYWRITING. I have started (yet another) epic poem. I’m aiming for it to be a horror poem set in space. I would like Photographs to accompany it, so I will include a list of shots IF I ever finish it. And that’s a BIG IF. I have never as of yet, finished any epic poem. In fact I barely finished anything in the last 5 years. An awful long time to go without getting things done. I’m on a bad drought. I’ll finish something someday. I’m sure of it. I just don’t know when that day will be. I hope it’s soon. I’m getting desperate, depressed, and frustrated that I haven’t completed anything. I have lots of ENERGY when STARTING things but lose all hope before I ever see the end.
I definitely plan to continue and do photography. I really like it. I went off in 2010 after less than a few months after taking it up. But it’s been some time and my HTC Desire Camera has really helped get me back into it. I should have gone digital earlier. I think I made a mistake trying to start off with 35mm film. But anyway, I have been suffering a WRITER’S BLOCK this weekend and struggled to get anything written. But I blew it off tonight with nearly 2 pages of poetry for my Epic Horror Poem. I just hope I can bloody finish it! That’s the key at the moment. To finish what I start. I’ll never get anywhere unless I finish something I start. All these unfinished projects I have on my computer are unbelievable. I must have written and rewritten one of my stories at least a thousand times. I keep just keep going back to it, and rewriting it over and over again. It’s the only thing I seem to get new ideas for. I must have imagined it in EVERY medium imaginable. From plays to film to music and comics. It’s CRAZY!!
But anyway; GET THIS POEM FINISHED. Then figure out photographic illustration. Then somehow get it all published. And after that, I can start something else.
Cess Pool of Failure Sunday, April 29, 2012
Posted by angstycrayon in Art, Comics, Composing/Composition, Music, Photography.Tags: Art, Comics, composing, Logic Studio, Music, Photography
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It has all gone wrong again. What do I have left? Just writing and photography. But I suck at both. I THOUGHT I have a good thing going with music. I was just doing the chords and rhythm in Notion 3. But after listening to it today with fresh ears I’ve realized just how awful it really is. I mean, fuck me, it’s bad. I feel like I’ve wasted the whole year so far trying to do music when I just COMPLETELY and UTTERLY stink at it. My whole world has come crashing down on me. I suck at music. I’m ready to admit it now. I’m laying in a CESSPOOL of FAILURE. Something which I can’t escape from. I have wasted everyday that I did music since 2009 (when I took it up).
BUT HOLD ON!! What’s this!? I have a life line in PHOTOGRAPHY?
I SURE DO!! I may suck at the moment at it. Although not as bad as music or drawing. But I understand photography books that I have whereas I didn’t the music theory or music composition books. (Despite getting Dummies and Idiots Guide books). After all, isn’t photography merely the press of a few buttons on a camera? A device I actually can work. Unlike Logic Studio 9 which has so many functions I don’t think even Apple know what they all do. I know I kept saying that music is ‘Nothing but notes.‘ But it’s so damn complicated that I DON’T know if anyone TRULY KNOWS HOW TO COMPOSE MUSIC. It’s bloody hard!! It’s frustrating, annoying, complicated, and really fucked up to put it bluntly. Why can’t music composition be simple? A note here, a note there, and BOOM! A wonderful symphony.
But NOOOOOOOOO!!! It HAS TO BE HARD, doesn’t it?
Nothing’s easy these days. It’s all requires talent. Something I don’t possess in music. I MIGHT have it for photography. Afterall, I have plenty of ideas for pictures. But no way of committing them to camera. I lack money and models. I reckon, despite what I said in my last post, I could do a really good ARTY PHOTOGRAPHIC NOVEL/COMIC. I have LOADS of cool ideas! I think with the right financial backing I could do really well. I MEAN really well. I came up with several ideas for Monthly/Bi-Monthly Arty Photo Magazines that I could do. Again, all I need to do is find some publisher to back me for them and BLAM! I’m hailed as a super genius (!!).
I’m kidding. Maybe not a super genius. But certainly these magazine ideas could be cool. Of course, in my fantasizes I shoot myself dead after getting super rich and famous from them. But still, even if that doesn’t happen, I reckon I could shift a few hundred-thousand copies a month AT LEAST. I know I suck at music. I know I suck at drawing. I’ve just got to improve my storytelling skills, brush-up on my photo-snapping and I could be in their making big £££s.
I can dream, can’t I?
What Happened to Photo-a-Day, Mr. Crayon? Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Posted by angstycrayon in Art, Drawing, Music, Photography.Tags: Art, Comics, composing, Drawing, Music, Photocomics, Photography
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I have only managed 1 photo-a-day post and then nothing. That was last Wednesday. So, what happened? I guess I could sit here in bed, and type a load of excuses. But I won’t. I’ll spare you from my bullshit. The simple, short, answer is, I simply COULDN’T BE BOTHERED. I was getting all excited about photography on that aforementioned Wednesday (18th April) and then the next day, I just didn’t want to do photography anymore. It took this week to realize that I actually do want to do photography. The problem is I want to do grandiose photocomics with beautiful models and I CAN’T DO IT RIGHT NOW. I don’t have access to any models or money to hire models. I need to write a script detailing the various shots, and then somehow get a publisher interested to provide the necessary funds.
It’s all rather time-consuming. I checked out the COMPETITION and they’re all so good. Be sure to visit — AlienLovesPredator.com and NightZero.com. These are super cool. I spent some time reading their websites and I got completely put off mine. I had a confidence crisis. I feared my ideas were rubbish (they are) and wouldn’t get anywhere. So, I went back to music composition. I did try some drawing but it went horribly wrong, which also helped put me off. Since NightZero.com is storyboarded before shooting. I thought I could draw the storyboards for mine but because my attempted drawing of a woman’s face came out horribly wrong. It put me off the idea. I was starting to think my drawings were getting better and BAM! I go and draw an utter piece of shit like that.
Here it is.
I tried. I really did try to get it right. But it came out really wrong. I suppose it isn’t that bad… IF I WERE FIVE YEARS OLD!! Haha! It took 30 minutes to draw and I thought after getting the head shape right, things would come together and the rest of the drawings would go smoothly. I WAS WRONG. But anyway. That drawing has put me off drawing a bit. I still would love to draw. Afterall, I have a 150 piece paint set coming for my birthday (June 20th) and I would love to use it to its full extent. But at the moment it seems though it will spend most of its years gathering dust in my room. Which is a shame.
Music has gone a bit better though. I’ve gone back to NOTION 3 notation software. I didn’t seem to be getting anywhere with Logic Studio 9. So I thought a change would be good. I’ve done quite a decent choral backing. All I’ve got to do is that damn melody. I tried once today, went wrong, *almost* put me off. But a quick delete of it and I was back to just sticking with the chords. But I’ve got to tackle that melody at some point. I just hope I don’t get put off again. Or what will that leave me with? Just writing I suppose. But my characters are 2D and my stories weak and pathetic.
Man, I STILL SUCK.
Photo-A-Day: Stuff In My House Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Posted by angstycrayon in Art, Comics, Photography.Tags: Art, Camera, Comics, HTC, Photo Comics, Photography, Photos, Pictures
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I’ve decided to definitely purse posting as many photos as I can each day. I hope this not only encourages me to get out more, but to get into a regular routine of updating the site, and keeping my eyes sharp for a good photo opportunity. I have already been looking at possible shots last night whilst laying in bed. I thought a good one of my cat laying on my pillow illuminated by my iPod touch would have been good. But when I snapped it, it didn’t turn out like I thought it would. But I’m at least trying now. I’m REALLY getting into this photography again. Too bad I gave it up first time round. I might have gotten somewhere with it by now.
But never mind I suppose. We live and learn.
Anyway, I woke up this morning 4:30am and been once again thinking about what I could snap pictures of. I laid in bed till 6am before wandering around the house and I snapped this nice shots of just random things I thought would look good. Let’s get stuck in, shall we?
(ABOVE) This is the Children In Need teddy bear just hanging about on my Mum’s keyboard. She hardly plays it now since she’s been into Art. The pictures/drawings in the background are My Mum’s. I added some glitter to the shot to bring it out a bit. I also sharpened the view too. Looks quite handy, doesn’t it?
(ABOVE) This is a statue of a cat that sits outside in my back garden. I added some light to it to make it shiny, as if it were being shined upon by God himself.
I had a good zoom in on this picture too.
(ABOVE) This is my lovely cat!
I wanted him to look directly at the camera whilst I snapped the picture but he kept looking away. I made the picture slightly grey in tone to added an oldie effect to it.
(ABOVE) A Golliwog that my mum has. They’re considered racist now. But who knew they liked Coca-Cola? I added an icy feel to this as well some sparkiness in the top left hand corner.
I have successfully completed one of my goals for today. (Snap photos and post them). I plan to do some drawing as well. I did a lovely drawing of a woman’s head that I am quite pleased with on Monday. I will see if I can post a picture of it. It’s still amateurish drawings but it shows vast improvement. If only I could practise more. I was meant to do some last night but got a little carried away in the photography and posting to this site. Constantly checking to see if I had gained any new visitors
. I plan to write a book proposal for a PHOTO COMIC that I had an idea for.
I’d love to photograph and write it now. But I don’t have the funds to hire MODELS and PROPS at this present time. I’m hoping to get the backing of a publisher and then shoot it in London or something with a couple of female models. The COMIC will be about urban female life intercut with poems. I think it COULD be a big success if I do it like I imagine. I want a gritty feel to it and I think that would be best achieved by shooting the photos on Camera Phones or Compact Digital Camera. That’ll not only be easier for me (since I own both) but also for the publisher who wouldn’t have to splash out on expensive cameras for the shoot. But anyway, I’m getting a bit head of myself at the moment. I will need to write a good proposal first; laying out the kind of shots I want. The sort of style, lightning etc. Maybe doing some drawings/sketches to include with them. Then write all captions/dialogue. But let’s hope I can do it.
FIRST things FIRST. PHOTOGRAPH MORE. Learn as much AS I CAN. Then I can tackle this PHOTO COMIC.
A Hard Day’s Night Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Posted by angstycrayon in Art, Photography.Tags: Art, Camera, Camera Phone, HTC, Photography, Photos, Pictures
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I’ve done YET MORE photographs on my HTC Desire phone. The others are available here (#1, #2, #3 & #4). Instead of just posting them via the WordPress Android app. I will upload them to my Laptop, and add some commentary to them. Just so you know what I was aiming for and the reason for taking the photographs were. I have been a bit agitated tonight, I should point out. I’ve spent most of the day playing with my phone and taking pictures. Then posting them to the site. I’ve been desperate for some comments on them. But sadly, this blog doesn’t get many visitors. I’ve usually held the view that I don’t want people to particularly read my blog. I’ve been doing it mostly for therapy. Just something for myself to read. I don’t even let my parents or family read it!
But anyway, I’ve been posting my photos to the site, hoping that maybe someone, ANYONE will pop a comment. Or that they might get some hits for once. (Lately, I’ve been doing a few good posts that I don’t mind people reading). I actually WANT PEOPLE to read, comment, discuss them etc. Usually, as mentioned, I didn’t want anyone to know about this blog. But now I do. I’ve come to like this little web home of mine. Even if it portrays me in a negative light. possibly as a stupid, angry, messed up individual that is useless at everything. But I’ve started to get back into photography since I’ve been doing photos on my HTC Desire phone. I tried it back in 2010 with a 35mm film camera. But never really took to it. I suppose getting a film camera was a big mistake for an amateur. I should have gone straight for a digital. But nevermind, I suppose. I’m now back into Photography. So let’s go wild for me again.
I am now AIMING to post as many PHOTOS-A-DAY as I can. I hope it motivates me to keep going and to STICK AT IT THIS TIME!! Now for the photos themselves. I hope you like.
(ABOVE)) this is a snap of some PLANTS that’s near my home. They’re in my neighbour’s garden. It was getting dark so my Phone had to use the flash. I wanted to highlight some of the colours and added some sparkle to it to bring out the reflections of the flash. It looks pretty decent but I suppose I could have done better. I’m still learning this whole photography thing. Still, I think it looks kinda pretty. Some kind of warped art you might find in galleries. It would make a lovely still-life painting, wouldn’t it?
(ABOVE) This is the picture, or idea for a picture that drove me to get off my arse and go out to take photos tonight. I saw this street light out my window, and I instantly wanted to photograph it. It then inspired, as mentioned, for me to wander around my village looking for other things to snap. I think it looks amazing. I really like how the light has come out. The blurriness of the actual lamp mixed with some lightning effects. I love it. My favourite of the night. The trees in the background only enhance the effect. You can just about imagine yourself there, looking up at it.
(ABOVE) This is another photo I took tonight that turned out lovely. It’s of a forest that’s near the back of my house. My cats love wandering about in it. It’s not a major forest or anything like that. Just a clump or collection of a few trees. Again, I choose a good shot I thought. The light has turned out very well and the darkness/shade of the trees only enhances the picture. I think I did rather well with this one.
(ABOVE) This is the road upon where the forest and the previous shots were taken. Again the blur of the street lamp and purple effects of the night sky makes this pretty decent, I thought. Not as good as the last two shots but better than the shots I’ve taken with film camera. I’m getting a good eye for a composition. Still a rank amateur outsider though.
(ABOVE) This looks at first glance like car headlights or something like that. But it is actually the arrow sign in the previous picture. The flash was used again and it reflected off the sign. I thought it’s a nice bright picture. The effects I used help blur and smudge the light, gives it a nice overall effect.
(ABOVE) This is a shot down my street. I didn’t use any lightning effects for this other than making the sky more purple colour. A simple picture.
(ABOVE) This was a GIVE WAY sign that I snapped at the end of my street. The light which it gave off blurred it too much and you can’t read it. But I decided to use that to my advantage when editing it and made the overall lighting effect very bright. Giving off an almost ‘Godly’ glow. You may be able to notice the blur of the car going by. I waited until a car went past before snapping the photograph.
(ABOVE) This is another shot of a street lamp just at the corner of my road. I added a grainy effect to give it some presence. Otherwise it might have been a dull and uninspiring shot. It fits well with the telegraph pole next to it. I made sure the night sky was lightened to make it seem lighter than it actually was out there.
I had a good, brief, shoot but it was getting darker by the minute and my back was hurting so I couldn’t stay out too long. But I’m hoping that these photographs and generally how well they came out will inspire me to keep going. To post a Photo-a-day or as many as I can. This means I will (finally) start going out more as I search for things to snap. I will probably run out of things to shoot round my village so it mean going into town. I am lucky in that I live near the coast. So I can always head to the beach to snap pictures of the sea. It’s summer time too so there’ll be plenty of holidaymakers around to photo too (if they don’t mind). It’s lighter too at night and that should mean I’ll be able to stay out longer than normal. All it will take is a little determination to see this photography thing through, a keen eye, and sharp reflexes to get that perfect shot. I REALLY DO hope photography works out for me. It could be so good for my health and mind. I mean, I will need to be out and about to photo which will help ease my problems of anxiety and social phobia.
I’ll be in fresh air, getting exercise and generally being very creative. What could be better? If I get on with it enough. I could get a Digital Camera or Photoshop for Christmas as well as starting a college course (A-Level Photography) in October. I tried it once but dropped out after 2 weeks. It was 2010 and I was unsure what I really wanted to do with life. I was still quite immature and lazy. Not that I’ve changed much. But I’ve grown a bit since then and can handle social situations better than I did back then. Things to think about. I was probably wrong to give it up in the first place. But we live and learn. Like I said, starting out with a 35mm film camera was probably wrong (but it was cheap off Ebay).
LET’S NOT QUIT THIS TIME, HUH?
Yet More Photos I Took Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Posted by angstycrayon in Art, Photography.Tags: Art, Camera, HTC, Photography, Photos, Pictures
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Here are some more photographs I have taken with my HTC Desire phone. Here are the past ones (#1, #2 , #3)



